California

(how we got here)

Ever since I was a teenager, I've wanted a life in California. One that didn't involve quite so many "rules" as my parents religion. I'm not really sure why I picked California in particular, other than it was way the fuck away from small-town Missouri and it had an ocean. Oh, and I wanted to be in Los Angeles, because I wanted to be in a city. (I also L.O.V.E. New York City, but it's too frickin cold for me!)

My very first trip to Cali was a flight into Reno, NV, staying with my (ex) boyfriend's friend somewhere between Sacramento and Reno. It was so beautiful. I learned I'm pretty bad at skeet shooting, and that "keeping up with the boys" when it comes to tequila shots is a pretty bad idea.

This trip with my (ex) boyfriend involved spending an afternoon in San Fransisco, driving up the 1 to Bodega Bay where we spent the night, then winding our way back home via Napa Valley (with a few stops, of course!)

It was beautiful, if not the city.

In 2005, Keith was working for a company that several offices in California, and he flew out several times, mostly to San Jose.

One of his trips was scheduled for January of 2006 to Irvine, CA, in Orange County, when I was pregnant with Josie. Matthew was still (at 2 years old) not sleeping through the night, and I knew that after Josie was born, I'd be getting even less sleep than I was already, so we planned to buy me another ticket and I could go with Keith on this trip. (I mean, who wouldn't want to go to Southern Cali in the middle of winter?!)

That trip in January fell through, and once I hit my third tri-mester, I told Keith he wasn't allowed to travel without me. When they rescheduled his trip for March, he passed along my request, and his company paid for my plane ticket! We had an awesome weekend (Fri-Tues), and met some really great people that lived in Venice Beach, Ian and Alicia.

For two years, Ian bugged us about coming back out for a visit. Keith and I finally managed to go in 2008 for another long weekend. The first thing Ian said to us was "where's your kids?", at which point I laughed, because this was the first break I'd had since the last time we out in CA.

We fell in love with what is known as "the Westside". (That would be anything west of the 405.) This included Santa Monica, Venice Beach, Mar Vista and Culver City.

Keith started looking for a job in these areas. Because even though we loved LA and California, the point was to live and work on the west side so we wouldn't have to deal with traffic. I mean, what's the point of living in paradise if you have to drive 2 hours in traffic to just get to and from work?

So life went on, and in August 2010 we came out as a family, and not only did my kids get to fly for the very first time, they got to visit the ocean! And eat at In-n-Out Burger! We had an awesome vacation.

This past April, Keith was doing some research for something his company was going to start implementing, and ran across a blog that listed companies that were hiring. One of them happened to be a very well known company. Keith clicked on it, and it listed it's location as Santa Monica, CA. Interesting. So he clicked again, and the qualifications needed was his "exact" skill set. Interesting. He applied and sent his resume thinking that nothing would happen of it. He expected a "thank you but we're only looking at local candidates" type of response.

The very next day, the HR department called and said they wanted to set up a phone interview. Um, ok! So the phone interview is set up, and the day after that she calls again and says they want to fly him out for a face-to-face interview. WHAT?!

We just might actually need to tell a few people at this point. Especially since I had just told my sister not 4 months before that we weren't looking to move anytime soon. So we told our best friends and my adopted family.

He spent the weekend after my birthday in LA for his interview (which he NAILED, btw) staying with Ian and Alicia again.

By the end of the next week, he had signed paperwork, turned in his notice at his old job, and we told the rest of our families.

Within 3 weeks, we went from "we're not even looking" to "OMG, WE'RE MOVING TO CALIFORNIA!!!"

Keith left Kansas City on June 5th, and the kids and I joined him on July 27th. During that time I had so much help packing and getting the house ready to move that I could never express my thanks enough to those that helped. My friends ROCK, y'all.

So now we've been in Santa Monica for 3 months now and we're all fitting in quite nicely. Even Matthew, who I think had the hardest time adjusting. I love my kids school and I love their teachers. Well, Matthew's teacher, anyway. Josie's teacher I'm kinda 'meh' about, but she's nice and Josie doesn't have any problems.

Keith L.O.V.E.S his new job, and they love him. We're starting to find people we can be friends with as well.

We all miss everyone back in Kansas City terribly, though. We can't wait until we get the house there sold so we can come visit everyone. (I would count the days, but that's not exactly how the housing market works)

And... it's still fucking perfect out here.

Fighting for peace

Here in the United States, we have a volunteer military. It wasn't always this way. Right now our military is stretched thin, and a draft in the near future is possible. I hope it doesn't come to that, but it is possible. *Maybe not kicking the gays out would help*

In Israel, serving in the military is required, for both men and women. I think the requirement is 2 years, but I'm not sure about that. This has been part of the Israeli culture for many decades.

Today, I was introduced to Omer Goldman, via Ed Asner. There is a new generation of young Israelis standing up to the government. They believe in a better, more peaceful future for themselves and for Israelis and Palestinians, and they are refusing to join the Israeli army. They're in jail, holding strong against immense pressure from family, friends and the Israeli government.

Omer's own words:

I first went to prison on September 23 and served 35 days. I am lucky, after 2 times in jail, I got a medical discharge, but I'm the only one. By the time you read this, many of my friends will be in prison too: in for three weeks, out for one, and then back in, over and over, until they are 21. The reason? We refuse to do military service for the Israeli army.

I grew up with the army. My father was deputy head of Mossad and I saw my sister, who is eight years older than me, do her military service. As a young girl, I wanted to be a soldier. The military was such a part of my life that I never even questioned it.

Earlier this year, I went to a peace demonstration in Palestine. I had always been told that the Israeli army was there to defend me, but during that demonstration Israeli soldiers opened fire on me and my friends with rubber bullets and tear-gas grenades. I was shocked and scared. I saw the truth. I saw the reality. I saw for the first time that the most dangerous thing in Palestine is the Israeli soldiers, the very people who are supposed to be on my side.

When I came back to Israel, I knew I had changed. And so, I have joined with a number of other young people who are refusing to serve - they call us the Shministim. On December 18th, we are holding a Day of Action in Israel, and we are determined to show Israelis and the world that there is wide support for stopping a culture of war. Will you join us? Please, just sign a letter. That's all it takes.

Everyone should have the choice to serve or to not serve. Everyone should have the choice of promoting peace without resorting to war.

Jewish Voice for Peace is the U.S. group heading things up for the Shministim. Sign the petition here if you want to stand up for Omer and those like her.

Myself, I've always been conflicted about military service. Growing up as a Jehovah's Witness, one of the many 'rules' was NO MILITARY SERVICE. If you joined the military, you were turning you back on "God" and putting your faith in 'Man'. No matter what country you were in. They were really big on the whole "you'll find Catholics killing Catholics and Protestants killing Protestants, but you'll never hear of JWs killing JWs"! I've always had a strong respect for those that choose to fight for the freedoms I enjoyed. I was hyper-aware, you might say, because I wasn't allowed that choice.

I never took my right to stand without my hand over my heart during the Pledge of Allegience for granted. NEVER. In fact, the very first fight Keith and I ever had was about that very subject. My religion forbade me certain things, and I was grateful that others had given me those rights so I didn't have go to prison. JWs in other countries weren't always so lucky. Hell, during the draft days, many of the JWs DID go to prison for refusing to serve in the military. Or, like my father, used the loopholes in the system to keep their names from coming up.

I think the draft has it's place, honestly. And the next time it is used, I hope they start including women. I don't think it's fair in this day and age to exclude them.

But I don't think military service should be mandentory all the time. Only when it's needed. And everyone should have the choice, no matter what country they live in. Everyone should have the choice to stand up for what they believe in.

black people still can't catch a break.

Black Man Given Nation's Worst Job

WASHINGTON—African-American man Barack Obama, 47, was given the least-desirable job in the entire country Tuesday when he was elected president of the United States of America. In his new high-stress, low-reward position, Obama will be charged with such tasks as completely overhauling the nation's broken-down economy, repairing the crumbling infrastructure, and generally having to please more than 300 million Americans and cater to their every whim on a daily basis. As part of his duties, the black man will have to spend four to eight years cleaning up the messes other people left behind. The job comes with such intense scrutiny and so certain a guarantee of failure that only one other person even bothered applying for it. Said scholar and activist Mark L. Denton, "It just goes to show you that, in this country, a black man still can't catch a break."

Damn, I love the Onion!

Remember, remember, the 5th of November

Today is November 5, 2008. A day I will never forget.

It's the day after America stood up and told the Religious Right where they could shove their agenda. (Mostly. All of the gay-marriage bans passed. We're still working on that.)

It's the day after America voted a bi-racial man as President of the United States of America. For the first time EVER, there will be a (half) BLACK man in the White House. I am so proud to have had a part at this moment in history. I'm amazed that it happened before my children could vote. Absolutely amazed.

Yesterday, America stood up and rejected hate. Yesterday, America stood up and rejected fear.

Do I think that Barack H. Obama, our president-elect, is the be-all, end-all, savior of the nation? Fuck NO! He's just a man. A politician at that. There will many of his "promises" that he does not keep. But he does know the Constitution, and he believes in the constitution.

He has charged us all in rebuilding our country. It is OUR responsibility to pick up that challenge, and hold him to OUR ideals. To hold him responsible for what he said he would do. And yes, our country DOES need to be rebuilt. Have you not been paying attention to what W has done to our nation? We are a laughing stock to the world. Our economy is in shreds. Our privacy has been stripped away from us.

But god-dammit, this is a start in taking back our country from the crazy nuts that are trying to impose their religious dogma on the rest of us. And they are, whether you believe that or not.

I grew up in a religion that wouldn't let me hold any office in the church. A religion that believed the only place a woman had was in submission to her husband. A religion where I had no voice. A religion that told me what to think, how to dress, who to talk to, who I could be friends with.

I walked away from that religion, and in doing so, lost my blood family. I walked away from every friend I'd ever had. Twenty-eight years of friendships and family, reduced to nothing.

So yeah, when religious people try pass laws based on their particular beliefs, I get really pissed. I've paid a very high price for my religious freedom, and I will let no one take that away from me.

This country was founded with freedom for religion, which includes ALL religions, not just the Christian faith, and the freedom FROM religion.

Keep YOUR religion at home, out of our public schools, and out of our government.

"I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America and to the Republic for which it stands, one nation, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."

Just because you think the majority has the right to impose their beliefs on everyone else doesn't make it right. Sometimes we do whats right because it's the right thing to do, not because it's what everyone thinks should happen.

If we didn't, women still wouldn't have the right to vote, and blacks would still be slaves.

So all you Republicans who think that the world just ended and are wondering why, stand up and take your party back from the Religious extremists. Maybe then the rest of us won't mock you anymore.

People should not be afraid of their governments.
The governments should be afraid of their people.

New Address for the Family Site!

In case you haven't been checking the link over on the right, Keith has set up a blogger account for the family site, we shall not be self-hosting anymore.

New Sader Family Website.

Eventually he'll get redirect working so that when you type in saderfamily.org, you'll get to the new site, but he hasn't done that yet.

sigh

So the computer that died the other night? Yeah, that was our server for the family website. All of the content is gone...

We still have all the pictures on a different computer, thank the IPU, but Keith lost all of his content, and I doubt we can get it back, which totally sucks because he had some really awesome posts.

And...

My sister is getting a divorce.

Apparently we should have done our drinking at the end of the weekend instead of at the beginning. Bleh.

Two down...

Go Connecticut!

MUWAHAHAHAHAHA!

I love it when hate is ridiculed!

The pirates of Little Rock stole Fred Phelps' Westboro Baptist Church's thunder last Friday. The Topeka church was protesting the National Conference of Editorial Writers because they are "responsible for the satanic milieu in this evil land" and for assisting the "satanic agendas" of "baby-killers and fags."

But in a fortuitous twist, the protest happened to fall on International Talk Like a Pirate Day.

Swashbuckling Flying Spaghetti Monster worshipping Central Arkansas Pastafarians decided to join the counter protest in full pirate gear.

The Arkansas Times gave this account:

Yep, the cuckoo Phelps hate group walked the plank this morning after a happy bunch dressed like pirates and holding signs saying "God hates shrimp -- Leviticus" and "God hates cotton-polyester blends" stood opposite them at the corner of Markham and Scott streets. The group, made up of Central Arkansas Pastafarians, waved swords and growled "Arrghh!" in a manner that would have made Abbie Hoffman proud.

"They didn't know what to do," a pirate named Boatswain (aka Gerry Schulze) tells The Pitch. "We decided that the best way to handle them was ridicule. They had not earned our hatred, only our ridicule and perhaps our contempt."

"I had a blast that day," says Pasta Pontius Pirate (aka LeeWood Thomas).

Pirate 1, Phelps family 0.

YES!

*sigh*

I did it, finally.

I know, I know, I'm WAY behind the times. And Fate, you can stop laughing now.

Dammit. I said I wasn't going to join, but I did. Sue me.

You can find me on twitter (yes, twitter) now.

hoochimama, if you really want to know how much my kids are driving me crazy.

gah. I may just shoot myself, really.

Sales PSA

If you eat meat and have a Price Chopper Shopper card, Price Chopper is having a huge sale on their meat. Brisket is $1.28 / pound, and 80% ground hamburger is $1.69 / pound. I picked up two briskets for our August bbq.

Old Navy is having a HUGE 50% off all their summer stuff. If you like Old Navy, get your ass in there!

Both of these sales go until July 8th.

rudely woken up this morning

So the kids managed to drag me out of bed a bit before 8 am this morning (they were HUNGRY), and sitting at the table watching them eat their oatmeal, listening to the radio, trying to fall back asleep, I heard the most awful news. I think I'm going to cry.

Pro-life, Anti-woman:



Religion is bullshit:



10 Commandments:



Bye, George.

Holy shit!

Today is a special day here at casa de Sader. June 10, 2008 marks the 7th anniversary of the day Keith and I were married. We've been together 9 years in total. I can't believe it's been that long. It seems like just yesterday we were taking a chartered flight over the city and sharing our first kiss.

Everyone remembers our last anniversary, right? Yeah... There will be NO cooking in the house tonight! (I still haven't replaced the smoke hood on the stove yet. I should do that soon.)

We're going here tonight for dinner. If you choose to stalk us and show up for dinner, we will not be paying for yours, and we expect a gift. Money works.

to my baby girl...

It's only been two short years since you came into this world

and my how you've changed.

Happy Birthday, my little bare-foot princess!

lets talk about pain, shall we?

So pretty much everyone who reads this blog (all five of you) knows that I was scheduled for bilateral subpectoral augmentation mammoplasty yesterday. That's the official medical term for it. I called it getting new boobs.

Many of you also know that I have horrific migraines. The only thing that I've found that knocks out my migraines is Excedrin Migraine. Unfortunately, Excedrin Migraine contains aspirin, something I was not allowed to take before my surgery. It thins the blood out.

So what strikes THE NIGHT BEFORE my surgery? One of the worst migraines I've had in two years. Fucker. And I can't take anything for it! I got maybe 3 hours of sleep Tuesday night, and I'm sure I looked like death warmed over by the time I got to the surgery center.

The I.V. they gave me helped quite a bit with my sugar levels, but didn't get rid of the migraine. I spoke with the anesthesiologist when he came in, and he said that most patients who come in with a migraine do not have one when they wake up. They think it's because of the high concentrate of oxygen you get during surgery. And when I woke up, I didn't have migraine anymore! I was so very happy.

Honestly, I'm currently in quite a bit of pain, but it is NOTHING compared to my migraine. What's really weird is that most of the actual pain is right below my breast area, around my upper abdomen. It's also a bit swollen, but they said it would be because of sleeping on an incline like they wanted me too, so my actual breasts don't swell up.

I have a lot more arm movement than I thought I would, too. A lot of the women I know couldn't lift their arms up at all, and I have no issues. Of course, I'm moving around very slowly so as not to invite the pain, and I'm not lifting anything heavy, like my two-year old.

Tomorrow is my follow up appointment with my surgeon, and I should be able to take a nice hot shower when I get home. I can't wait for that!

Thanks for all the well-wishes, everyone. They really meant a lot to me.

squeeeeee

Pom had her hybrid!

Yeah, Chimpo had his last week too. It's been a busy week, dammit!

And neither of these makes me want anymore kids. I am soooooo done having babies!

address correction

Since none of can be bothered to check Spyder's genius, most of us just copied her post about the upcoming meetup.

The correct address for the Levee is 16 W. 43rd St., Kansas City, MO. We'll be on the patio, with cake!

drinking the kool-aid

By now I'm sure everyone's heard of the raid made on the YFZ Ranch earlier this week. I don't watch the network news, and I've heard it everywhere. PossumMomma even has an interview up with an escaped polygamist daughter and wife. (Scary thought: there's over a hundred MORE children still on that compound according to her.)

You'd be hard pressed to find someone not associated with this extreme sect that wouldn't agree with me when I say they are a cult. Waco is another example, not to mention the infamous Heaven's Gate.

But not many people automatically think CULT! when I talk about the religion I grew up in. But yet every year, thousands of people sacrifice their lives for this religion. And make no mistake, they ARE martyrs. They are revered within the religion as making the ultimate sacrifice to show their love for Jehovah. Many more are lauded for holding firm while not making the ultimate sacrifice, including Fate, who will have to tell his own story someday, if he hasn't already.

Yesterday, someone I've never met gave her life to this cult. But yet her death affects me because of circumstances. She was the sister-in-law of two very close friends of mine. One (that I know of) that had never even met her. But their hearts bleed for their brother, who is now a widower. Even sadder is the fact that this woman was only 22 years old. She had an entire life ahead of her. Her husband, their brother, is in his twenties as well, so he will eventually (hopefully) find love again and have a family, but he will be forever scared by this.

I shudder at the thought of his anger if he ever realizes what a crock his religion really is. A beautiful life, wasted. Simply for the pride of 12 old men in Brooklyn who refuse to admit that their policy regarding blood is wrong.

Well, not just pride. Think of the lawsuits from members who have had loved ones die for this belief, then to be told that there is "new light" and they can all take blood now.

And while many Elders within the Jehovah's Witnesses are fighting this policy and trying to bring about change, the governing body still hold firm, and another senseless death doesn't even merit news coverage.

This senseless death bothers me because of my family who are still in this cult. My parents are older, and they've had a chance to live their lives. But my brothers are both under 30, as are their wives. This could happen to them. And that scares me.

Regaining myself

Faith, I know I promised you this post months ago, but for various reasons, I'm only now getting around to it.

As many of you who read this blog on a regular basis, I've recently lost the extra weight that I had after Josie was born. Sadly, my boobs went with the weight. I went from this:

to this:

And anything you see in the last picture is mainly from Vicky's. My actual boobs don't fill a B cup anymore.

So, calls were made, , research was done, money put aside, and consultations were had.

Then my shower broke. Fortunately, our neighbor is going to help us fix it, and we have a shower downstairs that we've been using, so there's no urgency to get it fixed. *whew*

So I now have pre-surgery appointment with Dr. Bennett on Friday, April 25th (two days before my birthday!), and hopefully by the end of today I will have an appointment for surgery on Wednesday, May 14th.

I'm so excited! May's going to be a busy month anyway, but I really wanted to get this done before summer officially starts.

edited: Appointment made for 11:00am! squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

update

Well, yesterday went really really well. Everyone acted like adults, no screaming involved. An actual agreement to not push religious (or NON-religious) views to either party was made.

I'm very happy for my children, and jealous that my husband has a mother who realizes the value of family over religion (her words, no less).

I want a mother like that.

Freedom!

After being cooped up in the house with two sick boys for almost two days, I was going nuts! Keith is finally well enough to sorta help with the kids (he can feed them and change any diapers that need changing), so I escaped over to a friend's house this afternoon just to enjoy the quiet!

I'm also going out tonight with my favorite librarian and my little bro. We're going down to the new KC Power & Light District to check it out.

If we get lost, send in the search parties! I'm not driving, so I plan on being VERY tipsy.