I will not be silent. I will not vanish.

Not today.

Today, the day that was designated "Wear Purple for Tolerance" day.

As pretty much everyone who has met me knows, I am a former Jehovah's Witness. My parents are still, and so are my two bio brothers.

I spent two years in therapy to learn to accept that my parents will never truly love me unconditionally. I wasn't allowed to attend either of my brother's weddings. I don't have what most people consider a "normal" relationship with my bio family.

Instead, I have my family-by-choice. Parents, brothers, a sister. I've built an awesome circle of friends, who treat me far better than my bio family does.


I've also been a member of an Ex-JW Recovery forum on Yuku. This community has been an absolute savior for many, including myself. It's a place we can go and vent about the crap we deal with because of that fucked up religious cult and everyone KNOWS what we're going through. Because if you haven't been through it, you really don't know.

Several days ago, someone posted about the gentleman who took a very unusual path to dealing with the pain of loosing his religion. The same religion I left.

This was the article posted. About Richard Ivey III, who found inner peace by hanging from six hooks from a tree for four hours.

Now most everyone on this forum is atheist/spiritual, and very accepting of others choices/beliefs/lack of beliefs, but a couple of those that commented on this post mentioned how it looked like he was on the 'wrong path', that hopefully he wouldn't continue down this 'wrong path'.

So two days ago I stepped up on my soapbox.

I asked WHY it was the 'wrong path' for him to take? Who are they to judge him? Many people who had normal childhoods are into pain, tattoos, and bdsm. Just because it's outside of what is considered mainstream, people who are into this tend to hide it from the outside world. Because it's not acceptable, it's not 'normal'.

It's because of things said like this that there have been 5 suicides in the LGBTQ community. Because someone says something judgmental and kids hear this, and it tells them that they're not worthy, they're not acceptable, there is something 'wrong' with them for feeling this way or for liking certain things (like pain). It's not like we haven't had enough judging from the fucking religion we all have in common.

Stop the cycle of judgment.

That's a paraphrasing of what I posted. I used the word fuck exactly twice, and not once did I verbally attack a person. Their words, yes. That's the major rule on our forum, never do personal attacks. I triple checked my post to make sure there were no personal attacks. Because I was really angry when I wrote it. Because 5 teenagers have TAKEN THEIR LIVES because of shit like this.

Yesterday evening, a full day after I had posted, and after logging in several times during the day yesterday, I tried to log on, and discovered that I was banned, and I have no access to the forum anymore. Today I discovered that the guy that runs the board has unfriended me on Facebook.

I was given no warning, there was no email telling me I had been banned, either for 48 hours (as is common for first offenders) or permanently.

So I contacted the co-admin. She finally got an answer from the main admin who runs the site, who said, yes, he was aware that I had been banned, there was no mistake, and he wasn't going to talk about it. She went to look for the offending post, and it is no longer on the forum, not even in the locked thread part that no one sees. It's just gone. Vanished. Like it never existed.

I still don't know if the ban is permanent or not.

The irony of being kicked off the forum that's a haven for escapees of one of the most judgmental religions for telling people to be less judgmental has not escaped me.

But for it to happen on today was extremely painful.

Today was "Wear Purple" day, to stand up against intolerance, to stand up for unity despite differences.

Today I bleed from a cut I was not expecting. A cut given to me by a place that has been a refuge from intolerance.

I guess it's not anymore.

MUWAHAHAHAHAHA!

I love it when hate is ridiculed!

The pirates of Little Rock stole Fred Phelps' Westboro Baptist Church's thunder last Friday. The Topeka church was protesting the National Conference of Editorial Writers because they are "responsible for the satanic milieu in this evil land" and for assisting the "satanic agendas" of "baby-killers and fags."

But in a fortuitous twist, the protest happened to fall on International Talk Like a Pirate Day.

Swashbuckling Flying Spaghetti Monster worshipping Central Arkansas Pastafarians decided to join the counter protest in full pirate gear.

The Arkansas Times gave this account:

Yep, the cuckoo Phelps hate group walked the plank this morning after a happy bunch dressed like pirates and holding signs saying "God hates shrimp -- Leviticus" and "God hates cotton-polyester blends" stood opposite them at the corner of Markham and Scott streets. The group, made up of Central Arkansas Pastafarians, waved swords and growled "Arrghh!" in a manner that would have made Abbie Hoffman proud.

"They didn't know what to do," a pirate named Boatswain (aka Gerry Schulze) tells The Pitch. "We decided that the best way to handle them was ridicule. They had not earned our hatred, only our ridicule and perhaps our contempt."

"I had a blast that day," says Pasta Pontius Pirate (aka LeeWood Thomas).

Pirate 1, Phelps family 0.

YES!

ARRRR! Me name be Iron Anne Bonney, and don't ye forget it!

My pirate name is:

Iron Anne Bonney

A pirate's life isn't easy; it takes a tough person. That's okay with you, though, since you a tough person. You can be a little bit unpredictable, but a pirate's life is far from full of certainties, so that fits in pretty well. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from piratequiz.com.
part of the fidius.org network

Hate traveled to Kansas City today.

Today, while out running errands, I passed the funeral home on Holmes by I-435. There were several men lining the drive holding flags. I thought maybe a veteran had died or something.

Across the street by the exit ramp, were protesters with the standard "god hates fags" protest signs. (we all know who they are, I refuse to name them)

I quickly deduced that the funeral was not for a veteran, but for an active soldier who has fallen. I almost turned the car around to attend the service, just to piss the protesters off (stopping to thank them for making me aware that this was a soldier's funeral). If my children were old enough to learn the lesson, I would have.

The only point these protesters make with their hate is how insane they are. Is it any wonder so many people turn away from religion?

I'm very much against this war our current Governor-acting-as-President has embroiled our nation in, but like many others, I realize that our soldiers are (usually) following orders. They don't really have a choice about where they're assigned.

Here's to hoping that our next President will get us out of Iraq quickly and safely. I'm not holding my breath or anything, but I am hoping.

Funky Town!

TONIGHT, BITCHEZ!

9pm. I've even got a table reserved!

And seriously, you really think that after all that accuracy predicting the ice storm last week doesn't apply to the 6 inches forecasted tonight? Go check the weather channel, peeps.

Recent inbox funny.

So yesterday, I'm sitting at my computer, minding my own business (probably editing my post or surfing), and I get an email. From Mr. Paul Austin.

Hi

i saw your blog - may i talk with you?

My first thought is "which blog?", followed by "maybe he's an ex-jw needing help or a current jw trying to bring me back into the fold." So I bite.

Sure.

This is what I get in reply:

thanks for being so friendly

sorry just feeling sad and looking for anyone to talk too - sad cause of stuff in my life - medical stuff - a lot of people torment me or use my condition to hurt me - suffered a lot from both kids and adults - i wanted to go public with what was done to me but people werent interested - or at least the people who wouldnt be likely to exploit what was done to me werent interested - a lot of TV shows etc would exploit my condition

Instantly, I smell a rat, obviously. How on earth could he deem me "friendly" by my one word response to him?! And then there's the whole "condition" he's got that SO many people want to exploit, but no one to help with (awwwww, how sad) :(

So I sent him this:

I understand the pity party thing, got my own going on right now for various reasons. Nothing medical, fortunately. Why don't you create a blog, or look for support groups for your condition? I'm sure there's a forum somewhere with other people that have your condition. Try ezboard.com or meetup.com. It helps talking to other people that are going thru something similar.

I am not about to take his bait and ask WHAT his condition is. I hear nothing back, so I figured he got the hint, and will realize that I'm not going to fall for his scam. But after a bit, he tries again!

Is it ok to talk with you about my condition - my feelings - life like this - please?

Are you serious? Was I not caustic enough the first time? Apparently not! Gotta work on that.

No. I only allow positive people in my life. I don’t have time for anyone to drag me down with their negativity. Change your own damn life, don’t expect others to change it for you.

That should do it!